Advice for Parents

Please remember I am not you. Allow me to make my own choices and explore my being. Don’t ask me if I feel like a boy or a girl. Chances are I cannot explain my feelings to you in a way you can understand. I need you to make decisions on my health care when I am too young to make them, to base them on good information and not out of a desire to shield me from something you may perceive uncomfortable.

I need you to be honest with me about my health. Allow me to see my doctors on my own. When I am young, please keep my health and school records organised. When I get older, teach me how to do this myself. Always be my number one advocate and speak for me when I cannot communicate my needs and wishes. As I grow, teach me to advocate for myself. Regardless of my age, always respect my privacy. Please don’t use me as a poster child for XXY to your friends or the XXY community. These are sensitive issues, and my health and welfare are confidential information. One day I will become an adult, and it will be my decision about how much of my privacy I am willing to surrender. When you talk about me on support forums, remember nothing on the internet ever truly goes away.

I need you to love and accept me unconditionally for who I am. Take the time to listen to me and get to know me. I am the one to speak to about my private information. Doing so lets me know there is no shame in being me. Let me explore my artistic and creative self through art, dance, language, music, and skills.