Guestbook

I found this project and group right after having be kicked-out of another group, sadly led by cis heternormative men. The homepage here made me feel like home. A home shared where everyone would respect everyone's thruth. Where I could express myself openly and not being judged for who I am. And that's very important, beyond the chromosomes that we have. Thank you XXY Project!

I believe it was the XXY project that found me and I am ever so grateful that you did.
It was several years ago, shortly after I had posted an entry in a blog I used to write and it as a post called: "I am an XXY/Intersex kind of guy." I wrote it following a kind of public coming out as an xxy/intersex person participating in the local Pride Parade. This was several years ago and wow have things changed! Back then I had just really begun to explore the positives of being xxy, just beginning to make some peace with myself after all the years of shame and hiding that I'd been encouraged to maintain by well meaning physicians who knew actually nothing about the existential realities of being xxy but seemed to know quite a bit about the assumed medical and social discrimination I might find if I was to be open about my "condition." Instead, by participating in conversations with xxy why folks that I came into contact with via the XXY Project, I began to look at what I had always considered as "weirdness" as a commonly held experience among some, not all, but some of us xxy people. This was immensely freeing and healing and opened up other ways of looking at what in the past I had felt were abnormalities and problems in an entirely new light. It was, to say the least mind blowing.

For the first time I began to understand my own unique sexual desires and to view the kinds of sexual thoughts and fantasies in a totally new light - a light that shone into the darkness and brought forth clarity, understanding and acceptance of how the energies which our society labels as "feminine" and those labeled as "masculine," are in fact combined and integrated within me in ways that prior to finding the XXY project led me to believe that I was either seriously perverted or the victim of some grotesque sexual abuse....the truth being neither of the above.

The truth being a creative blending of the feminine and the masculine within me that is simply different. I have also found great support among the folks of the XXY Project for my decision to stop taking testosterone and to allow my body and its systems to regulate themselves naturally -- and naturally I have embraced the identity of intersex and found the courage and support to speak out openly about being intersex - about having 47 instead of the binary 46 chromosomes, the fact of biologically being literally non-binary. I could not have learned or done or come to the same degree of self acceptance had I not been found by the folks at XXY Project.

I have been grateful for this community for a long time as the parent of a currently 14-year-old 47xxy. The inclusive nature and worldly acceptance of all manner of chromosome variation humans, without criticism and condemnation, is what keeps me coming back. ❤️

I was dx'ed in 1976, 1986, told I couldn't make a baby but the doctors didn't know why. In 2002 I got a karyotype - xxy/xxxy/xy mosaic. And on the computer I found answers to my questions from 26 years past and continuing. The best answer was if you want to know something about xxy, ask someone who has it. Even after eighty years, my general practitioner said they saw the word in their books and one paragraph describing it.

I never tire of talking about xxy and how it has affected me because the world needs to know and the scientists appear not to be interested. This condition affects each of the people who have it in different ways. Some are male, some are female, some are both and still, others are neither male nor female.

This project allows us all to talk about all of these things and more. Thank you to the founders and participants.

Erin

Diagnosed XXY 30yrs ago & participated in study of multi chromosomal people 2018 at NIH.
Thanks for creating this venue

I’m 70. XXY Mosiac Male, but I don’t like being a man; it’s taken years to come to this realization. I’m rather a rare case as I was able to father 3 perfectly healthy daughters with no fertility help necessary. I’ve always struggled since just before puberty with feeling female—wanting to be female. XXY to me seems to be the explanation and the justification of why I’m this way. I’ve since learned it may not be so. Well, I claim it anyway.
It’s a rather long story of how I found out I was XXY and I believe that God led me step by step toward learning of it. One drastic piece of evidence was my defective heart valve which was fixed during heart surgery for an aortic aneurysm. My body has a few non-typical male features too. I can easily wear bracelets that are sized small for women, for example.
It’s too late in life for me to consider living as a woman. My wife, who I’ve been happily married to for 43 years now is not at all in favor of such a drastic move, though she has accepted me and my intersex nature as much as she can. It does help to be able to point to something like Klinefelter’s as an explanation for being who I am. It helps my 3 girls understand too. We have a very loving family.

No, I can’t transition but I did have something that I thought would let me get half way there. I found a lump in my left testicle and I was hoping it would be cause for my testes to be removed. I could then go on estrogen as my hormone to keep my bones healthy. Well, after tests, it turns out that the lump is a cyst and my urologist assures me it’s nothing to be concerned about. I was crushed. I still have hopes that some urologist or some study will show that it’s safer to have these cysts removed than not. If anyone reading this (who can see my email) knows of this being true, please get in touch with me. Anyone else maybe can respond here.

Oh, I used to fight my feminine desires. I thought they were sinful. I had so much guilt. How I suffered all those years for basically no reason. If you’re wondering, I did tell my wife before we were engaged about my tendencies. We both thought they would all go away after marriage. How naive. No, they get stronger the older you get I’m finding out.

I’m more accepting of myself and my nature now. Whether it was XXY or something in my brain before birth, I’m really a trans woman by today’s nomenclature, because one doesn’t have to change anything on the outside; she just knows on the inside who she is—except being intersex means I’m not exactly “trans;” I’m kind of already half there… in between.

I hope there’s a way that some of us can get in touch with each other. I don’t have any familiarity with this project or blog, but maybe there’s a place to post person to person.

💕 Dennia

Diagnosed 1996. Passionate about xxy and I/VSC rights.

I really appreciate the work you guys have put into building this resource which is without any doubt a far superior website in terms of supporting adult XXY's who rarely get a mention in parent focussed groups and web resources. I especially like how it acknowledges our diversity and leaves no one out.